Part IV: You would not believe how many times I've been approached by doctors when I've taken my dad to the hospital in the last two years. They see my dad, who has Parkinson's Disease and has lost lots of weight. I think they feel sorry for him in that he can't stand without help and his skin just hangs off of his body. Almost every time, the doctors ask me about whether I have a Durable Power of Attorney or a Do Not Resuscitate (DNR) Order for my dad.
I know that I've sounded frustrated in some of the previous posts on this topic, probably because I have been. This post is somewhat different in nature, because it focuses more on forgiving grace. If Christ freely forgives me for all the self-serving and sinful things that I do, then I can surely forgive the Well-Meaning Doctors, some who went at this topic with a gusto and a lack of sensitivity. After lots of prayerful consideration, Jesus has shown me that although some of the doctors have been somewhat pushy, while others have been more supportive, each of these Well-Meaning Doctors approached this topic strongly, because they didn't want my dad to have to live the remainder of his life in a near comatose situation hooked up to a life support system.
If Christ freely forgives me for all the self-serving and sinful things that I do, then I can surely forgive my dad for thinking that I'm money grubbing and want him to die early to get his money, when I have continued to support him throughout his health issues. Also, I can forgive my dad for arguing with me every time a doctor tells me that I needed to have this conversation with him. Additionally, I have to forgive him for not making these arrangements earlier, so that I wasn't faced with filling out the DNR forms on my dad and related guilt. After lots of prayerful consideration, Jesus has shown me that my dad is confused, at times, which affects his judgment related to these topics. .
If Christ freely forgives me for all the self-serving and sinful things that I do, then I can surely forgive myself for filling out the DNR form at the Veteran's Home, because Dad would not like to be kept alive for an extended period of time on a life support system in a near comatose state. After lots of prayerful consideration, Jesus has shown me, that forgiving myself was the most difficult of all of these, but if Jesus forgives me, then He would want me to forgive myself. Throughout all of this, I wouldn't trade any of the minutes with my dad, who has been a true blessing in my life, despite his resistance to addressing these topics. Debbie
