I Had Special Motives for Talking to the Minister After the Funeral

James 5: 13 Is any among you afflicted? let him pray. Is any merry? let him sing psalms. 14 Is any sick among you? let him call for the elders of the church; and let them pray over him, anointing him with oil in the name of the Lord: 15 And the prayer of faith shall save the sick, and the Lord shall raise him up; and if he have committed sins, they shall be forgiven him. 

We had visited Dad in the Veteran's Home earlier in the day, me with hopes of encouraging my dad to have a new zest for living, since I had heard from the nurse that he said he had given up. Later that day, my husband and I went to the funeral of a friend. I knew the minister some, because sat together with my friend's wife at one of the outside commemorations for Veteran's. 

 After the service, I went to tell him that it had been an inspiring service. I had hoped he'd go and pray over my dad and give him the will to live, but that's not what his job is, so I didn't ask that. Instead, I prayed for him to pray for my dad and that my dad's faith in Christ is sufficient to join him in heaven when Jesus calls him. He agreed to do so. 

 Instead of being reassured like I should have been, I ate much more than usual, hiding my fears about my dad's in all that I ate. I need to keep reminding myself that I need to put all of this in Christ's very capable hands! You wouldn't think I'd forget, but I've been doing that far too much lately!
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I Wanted More Time

Matthew 9: 12 But when Jesus heard that, He said unto them, They that be whole need not a physician, but they that are sick. 13 But go ye and learn what that meaneth, I will have mercy and not sacrifice: for I am not come to call the righteous, but sinners to repentance.

I'm really using this particular Bible passage, because of the literal meaning of they that are sick. Earlier in the week, the nurse the Veteran's Home had told me that Dad had said something about giving up. I shared with my husband that I wanted to spend the night in the local hotel near the Veteran's Home, so I could spend an extra day with him when we went there to see him.

 They got Dad up, so he could go with us to lunch. He didn't eat much, but never does and is eating less and less these days, although he did drink the chocolate milkshake that my husband got him. After about 45 minutes, my dad let us know that he was extremely uncomfortable and had pain from sitting that length of time. My husband wheeled Dad back to the room and the aides helped him into bed. 

 I took a used cup from his night stand and took it to the dining area to put with the meal cart. I almost stepped on the nurse and when I turned around, she mentioned that I needed to seriously consider getting Hospice services for Dad in that he said he had given up. I put the idea off for another week, secretly hoping that just that my presence would be enough to cheer him up and motivate him to have a renewed interest in living, but it didn't. Maybe, I'm the one who is sick, heartsick, because I'm greedy and want my dad to pull through one more time! Of course, I probably will always want a little more time with Dad. 
Care Giving Tips Video: What Is Lewy Body Dementia?
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I Needed to Remind Myself

1 John 2:17 And the world passeth away, and the lust thereof: but he that doeth the will of God abideth for ever.

In the last post, I talked about how I had been so hungry on a train trip to visit family, because I had been told that my dad needed a CT Scan. I hadn't been putting my stress and worry into Christ's very capable hands.  Now that I'm back home where I get better cell coverage, I called the veteran's home yesterday where my dad resides, because of his Parkinson's Disease. I asked about the results of the CT Scan, but she said that it was scheduled for a week from then.

 I asked her how Dad was doing and she said that he's not wanting to eat or to get up out of bed, although she encourages the staff to coax him out of bed, if at possible, because it keeps his lungs stronger. I asked her if Dad was refusing to eat desserts, his favorite food. He would just live on desserts if he had a choice. She said that she was told that he had been refusing to eat his dessert, although he would drink the shake mix like Ensure and eat the fortified ice cream, at times. She let me know that my dad had said, "That he was through!" Her impression was that he wasn't through with his meal, but through trying to fight to stay strong, that he was giving up.

 So, last night, I felt like I could have eaten the doorknobs off, again. I had a full meal for dinner and felt compelled to lick the plate off, and still felt I needed more to eat. I had two oranges, but still was hungry and ended up eating some cottage cheese and crushed pineapple in it's own juice. You'd think I'd remember the recent realization Christ gave me that my extreme hunger was related to my concerns about my dad, but did I? No! I was prayerful about why I was so hungry, and Jesus had it on my heart that my urge to eat again, was due to my stress and worry about my dad. Again, I needed to pray and turn this over to Christ's very capable hands and trust Him to get me through what lies ahead.

Care Giving Tips Video:What Is Lewy Body Disease?
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I Was Hungrier Than Usual

Ephesians 1: 8 Wherein He hath abounded toward us in all wisdom and prudence. 9 Having made known unto us the mystery of His will, according to His good pleasure which He had purposed in Himself.

I was on the train going to visit family. I felt extremely hungry at times where I wouldn't normally. As I thought about it, I realized I had eaten enough food, but still was so hungry I could eat the doorknobs off. 

 Then, there were times on the trip there and the trip back that my stomach was so upset that I thought that I might throw up, but I didn't understand it, at that point. I thought I was experiencing motion sickness, but that really wasn't what was going on.

 When I prayerfully contemplated this, after arriving home, Jesus helped me to better understand what was going on. On my first night on the train, I had gotten a call from my dad's veteran's home and they told me that they were going to do a chest x-ray on him, because they thought he had another bout of pneumonia.  The next day, they called me and told me that they didn't have pneumonia, as they had thought, but that it was suggested that Dad got a CT Scan. I asked the nurse what they suspected, but she didn't know. Christ showed me that it was my worry about my dad's well-being that had caused me to feel like eating and eating, even after I had eaten enough substantial food to hold me through to the next meal. 

 I have to continue to be mindful of this, because when I have the eat the door knobs off, it means that I'm trying to deal with my stress or worry on my own and I'm not putting it in Christ's very capable hands, trusting Him to get me through what lies ahead.

Care Giving Tips Video: What is Dementia with Lewy Bodies?
By: Alzheimer's Society via You Tube
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